Au revoir to 2010

    …no seriously, leave!
    Is anyone else already feeling a little 2011 fatigue? Let me start by saying that if one more person wishes me a “Happy New Year,” I will scream. Except if said person does so at work, in which case I will smile and return the sentiments. They think I’m nuts at work, so January is all about damage control. No, these days I save my screaming for my neighbors. They kinda owe me for restraining myself instead of inflicting serious bodily harm on their kids (why do kids insist on using bangers to ring in the New Year?… they don’t even light up)
    You know how people never miss things until those things are gone and dating other people (cough…). Well, 2010 I hope she was worth it, because I’m still here! And you are…well, History! Still it perplexes me as to why people are still in Christmas/new year mode.
    Get to work! but before you do take off those ridiculously cheap, ill fitted, sometimes blinking Santa hats (wearing a Santa hat will not miraculously make it Christmas again) Also on my naughty list are festive lights. Abeg, take down the nauseating, epilepsy inflicting lights. Christmas lights are particularly hateful when they play tunes and their batteries have run down. When the idea of knifing yourself in the ear begins to seem appealing, then it is time for xmas lights and all manner of decorations to go into hibernation.
    I also don’t want to burst anyone’s bubbles (okay maybe I do) but we do not have any remarkably decorated Christmas trees. So why so much hesitation in taking them down? There is no reason to marvel at lights in Nigeria… except maybe to marvel at how ill conceived the Christmas displays are, or at how there is no point in putting Christmas lights up if there is no freaking electricity. So please do your bank, shopping complex and company a favor and remove the embarrassing attempts at American/European festivity.
    In other news, when 5 minutes into every TV show you realize (much like me) that you start chanting KISS! Kiss! kIss! kiSS! (I mean every show: evening news, Madmen, time wrap, Dora the explorer, 30 minute meals…everything ) It might be time you accept the fact that maybe you should have gotten out more in 2010. So lets all get out there and make a good old 2011 effort!

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